I have something I want to share with you. I recently had a fruitful but difficult therapy session that was scheduled last minute ("emergency") because I felt generally and wholly terrible. There are many reasons why the terribles descended upon me, including a mysterious summer flu that peaked with a bout of bronchitis, a run-in with an ex, and a date from hades. Also included were general anxieties about the direction of my life, but that is not really the point of this post. The point is that I realized just how necessary it is for us to cherish ourselves and each another.
I know, I know -- it's like I've just crawled naked into bed with John and Yoko: all I'm missing is the tambourine. But dammit, I'm serious, even if it means being labeled a 2009 hippie. Forget sexy, lets bring love(-ins) back. I am not completely sure what the hell a love-in is, but in my vision we gather together and are just plain nice to each other. We are kind to strangers. W e pay it forward. Smile on each other, all that groovy stuff. Why not? In addition to just plain feeling good, recent studies show that positive relationships increase our life span.
On a particularly inspired day at the beginning the year, I wrote an optimistic blog detailing my great hopes for 2009. Hope 09 is basically a love letter to everyone I know; I wanted to stop and give thanks to/ for the people in my life-- both the relationships bitter and sweet. Yet, as I brayed through my last therapy session, the thoughts that kept me in buoyant anticipation of the new year were no where to be found. Put bluntly, I felt like crap and forgot my own encouraging words. Ah, life. Good therapy and time has found me, in passing moments, once again excited by thoughts celebrating our connections and settling into an understanding of what it is to be alive and sharing this space with one another. And so I went out and got this great tattoo -pictured above-to remind myself always. JK, JK!
On a particularly inspired day at the beginning the year, I wrote an optimistic blog detailing my great hopes for 2009. Hope 09 is basically a love letter to everyone I know; I wanted to stop and give thanks to/ for the people in my life-- both the relationships bitter and sweet. Yet, as I brayed through my last therapy session, the thoughts that kept me in buoyant anticipation of the new year were no where to be found. Put bluntly, I felt like crap and forgot my own encouraging words. Ah, life. Good therapy and time has found me, in passing moments, once again excited by thoughts celebrating our connections and settling into an understanding of what it is to be alive and sharing this space with one another. And so I went out and got this great tattoo -pictured above-to remind myself always. JK, JK!
Truly, we are more alike than different, and for this I am grateful.
Posts
Reminds me of that one Nada Surf song...
ReplyDeleteAngel - This is a really thoughtful and honest post and I appreciate you sharing it with the group. I can relate to everything you are experiencing, but especially to the reluctance to let yourself feel bad.
ReplyDeleteI sometimes forget that it's normal to feel restless, irritable and discontent and that my task some days is to jut sit in those ugly and awful feelings.
I am grateful that I have feelings and that letting myself feel shitty on Wed means I can also let myself feel elated on Friday.
You have such a lovely message and it makes me so happy whenever I read one of your posts.