Thursday, August 6, 2009

The City that Loves You Back?

Oh Planet Caroline, as a fellow female deity of the Philly dating scene, I hear you. Rather than knowing where to go on dates, however, I would like to know: where can a decent date be found?
I won't say that I can't remember the last time I went on a great date, because it wasn't so long ago....but the date was in Brooklyn with a New Yorker. Yep, I've had to travel to make it happen.
This is not to say that Philadelphia isn't awesome -- it is. I dearly love this city and I feel completely at home in nearly every corner, except the corner where you go to find / have a date, wherever that is. I am comfortable moving about the city alone, and will happily have a seat at a bar solo to enjoy a cold, cold beer while looking over the paper, or (nerd that I am) writing in my journal. I'm friendly, warm, funny (and yes, in an effort at being confident without being snooty, I am a pretty girl) and will not shoot a guy down if he strikes up conversation. I like people, all kinds, and even if the sparks of attraction aren't there I am always down to meet someone new. And yet, many of my dates have ranged from blah to disastrous.
I'll share story:
A local chef, cute and zany, happened upon me at Fergie's, where I was actually hosting a poetry reading. He knew one of my friends, and asked her to help him make a connection. A week later we went out, and after the initial awkwardness we warmed up and had a nice time. We shared a few margaritas (I agree with Shmittenkitten about "grabbin' a coffee"--no thanks) and some light nibbles, great conversation, laughter and then it was time for me to go. The mood was right and it was a really good first date --so as he opened the door to my cab I turned and laid a conservative but definite I-had-great-time-thank-you kiss on him. When I pulled away he pulled me back in for a bit more and he whispered I like kissing you, which was sweet and sexy. I hopped in the cab and waved goodnight. This was about midnight. Not bad, eh?
Half an hour later I got a text. It was from him saying, "I want to kiss your face." Uh, ok. A little weird but I'm open minded and I tried to see the poetry in it and thought nothing more. I didn't respond, figuring we could talk the next day. Ten minutes later I got another text. Again from him, this time saying something that I can even write here... but lets see... it used the word "suck" and referred to another one of my body parts.
Some time between the lovely conversation and laughter, the nice kiss and the closing of the cab door, that boy plum lost his mind. Why, Philadelphia? I know there are some decent guys out there, this diverse and exciting city has to be full of them. Show me a great guy to go out with, and I'll find a fun and unique spot for that first date...


  1. Hi Angel,

    I have many dating horror stories, which are awesome because they are so fun to retell. Last night I called the Shmitten Kitten hotline recounting my latest dating misfire. I haven't had a problem meeting people for dates...I just find them where I am at- online or out dancing. Since I'm outgoing, it's easy for me to chat up strangers. But it takes a thick skin because I've encountered countless rejections (snubs really) along the way.

    Right at this moment I don't know if dating is really worth the bother. I have more fun going out with friends or by myself than I do with date.

  2. Dating in Philly is rough...I once met a cute guy at a bar and we agreed to meet up for a date...only on the "date" I found out he had a girlfriend and just wanted to be friends. Thanks, Philly.

    But I eventually did snag Twenty, after about a year of off and on online dating. We joke that we met in a bar but we really met on match. Oh yeah, and I clicked on him first ;)

    Good luck girl, and don't give up hope!


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